Who sits around and thinks up this stuff??

Got this in email from Uncle Doug today. I never respond to these things but it fascinates me the things that I come across in email that people have forwarded over and over and over.

Can u find the B(there are 2B's)? DON"T skip or ur wish wont come true...


RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRRBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Once youve found the b


Find the 1

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII1III
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Once you found the 1..............



Find the 6


9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999699999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999


once youve found the 6...

Find the N (it's hard!!)

MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMNMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM

once you've found the N...


Find the Q...
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOQOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

make 2 wishes!


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OK, NOW THAT U MADE A WiSH, IT WILL COME TRUE.....ALL U HAVE 2 DO IS FORWARD TO 3 PEOPLE BUT IF YOU FORWARD TO MORE IT WILL HAPPEN SOONER!!!

I love you, Al Gore!

I saw the interview with Al Gore last night on Nightline. I pretty much agree with him about the subject of his new book, The Assault on Reason.
I'd like to read it sometime soon. I love that man!

Al Gore didn't write the following, but I thought it was appropriate for how I am feeling today.

What Your Selection Of Newspaper Says About You

• The London Financial Time is read by the people who run the world.
• The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
• The New York Times is read by people who think they run the country.
• The Washington Post is read by people who think they ought to run the country.
• USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don't understand the Washington Post.
• The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind running the country, if they could spare the time.
• The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country.
• The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too sure who's running the country.
• The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's running the country, as long as they do something scandalous.
• The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't sure there is a country, or that anyone is running it.
• The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another country.

The LIttle Donkey's Amazing Feat

One day a farmer's donkey fell into an abandoned well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old and the well needed to be covered up anyway; so it just wasn't worth it to him to try to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They each grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well.

Realizing what was happening, the donkey at first cried and wailed horribly. Then, a few shovelfuls later, he quieted down completely. The farmer peered down into the well, and was astounded by what he saw.

With every shovelful of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up on the new layer of dirt. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty
soon, the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and trotted off, to the shock and astonishment of all the neighbors!

There's an important lesson to be learned here: Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to not let it bury you, but to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a stepping-stone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up! Persevere!

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.

Oh, I almost forgot to mention this final tidbit: Once the donkey climbed out of the well, he immediately bit the crap out of the farmer who had tried to bury him. Which raises the true moral of this story...... WHEN YOU TRY TO COVER YOUR ASS, IT ALWAYS COMES BACK AND BITES YOU!!

When The End Of The World Arrives How Will The Media Report It?

USA Today: WE'RE DEAD

The Wall Street Journal: DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS

National Enquirer: O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN

Playboy: GIRLS OF THE APOCALYPSE

Microsoft Systems Journal: APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE

Victoria's Secret Catalog: OUR FINAL SALE

Sports Illustrated: GAME OVER

Wired: THE LAST NEW THING

Rolling Stone: THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR

Readers Digest: 'BYE

Discover Magazine: HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT
AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?

TV Guide: DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!

Lady's Home Journal: LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGEMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW
"ARMAGEDDON" DIET!

Inc. magazine: TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE

Microsoft's Web Site: IF YOU DIDN'T EXPERIENCE THE RAPTURE, DOWNLOAD
SOFTWARE PATCH RAPT777.EXE.

Sun: ARMAGEDDON TOLERANT SOFTWARE NOW AVAILABLE!

America Online: SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN. TRY CALLING BACK IN 15 MINUTES

Email Joke: In Retrospect........

1975: Long hair
2007: Longing for hair

1975: KEG
2007: EKG

1975: Acid rock
2007: Acid reflux

1975: Moving to California because it's cool
2007: Moving to Arizona because it's warm

1975: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2007: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

1975: Seeds and stems
2007: Roughage

1975: Hoping for a BMW
2007: Hoping for a BM

1975: Going to a new, hip joint
2007: Receiving a new hip joint

1975: Rolling Stones
2007: Kidney Stones

1975: Being called into the principal's office
2007: Calling the principal's office

1975: Screw the system
2007: Upgrade the system

1975: Disco
2007: Costco

1975: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2007: Children begging you to get their heads shaved

1975: Passing the drivers' test
2007: Passing the vision test

1975: Whatever
2007: Depends

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things..

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1987.

Their lifetime has always included AIDS.

Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.

The CD was introduced the year they were born.

They have always had an answering machine.

They have always had cable.

They cannot fathom not having a remote control.

Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.

Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.

They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.

They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.

They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.

They never heard: "Where's the Beef?"

"I'd walk a mile for a Camel" or "de plane, Boss, de plane"

They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.

McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.

They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

VIA email from Uncle Doug

Email Joke Time!

A first time entry from my brother......

~*~Hi Biddy!~*~

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)
(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour

(Don 't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home. What the...?!)

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes.lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmmm.)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure! that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig???)

Sonic loves me??

On our way to a new healthier lifestyle (not sure how long this is going to last), the girls and I have been taking the opportunity to eat out as much as possible this weekend while Dad is away, so that when he comes back, we can head wholeheartedly into our new way of thinking about and eating food. Sort of like a 'starting on Monday', type thing.

Sonic seemed to be the restaurant of choice and we ate there like 3 or 4 times in the past week. Mainly because of the new Tot toys for the girls (so cute) and the new Fury slush for me. (Man, those are delish!)

One thing I've noticed is how many salt packets, napkins and peppermints we've accumulated over the past few days. If you eat at Sonic and go through the drive-thru, you'll notice at the bottom of your bag a couple salt packets, an appropriate amount of napkins and some peppermints. Yes, peppermints.

Now I ask you, what other fast food restaurants can you think of that include peppermints in your order? None that I can think of. We have several major restaurant chains here in town and none of them take the time to add a breath freshener to my order. McDonalds? No. Long Johns? No. Pizza Hut? No. Dairy Queen? No. Subway? No.

No other restaurant even offers mints with my order. Occasionally, you have to ask for extras like salt. Most of the time, you won't get napkins unless you specifically ask for them. And even then, the squirelly people in the drive-thru would hand you an ungodly amount of napkins, like they were being sarcastic and making a point about me even having the gall to ask for napkins. This particularly irked me about McDonalds back when I used to eat there regularly.
But Sonic will give you all that stuff, every time you go through the drive-thru......free of charge.....you don't even have to ask. I like that. It sort of gives you a small sense that they really care for their customers. I like that a lot.

I just wish Sonic served better food.
I mean, ......they have great food.....taste-wise. Health-wise, not so much.

Still, I like Sonic....a lot.
And judging by the number of napkins, salt packets and peppermints I've accumulated the past few days, I'd say they like me too.

Nevertheless, I have to cut them out of my life today. It's time to start anew.
~~Sigh~~ It's Monday.

Email Joke Time!

There is really nothing going on right now. I am anxiously awaiting the end of the school year to better plan my days around both the kids being here. Now that Korey is almost walking, I hope to get back to geocaching and doing more things outside with the girls. I am also working up the gumption to get myself into shape and start making more healthier choices for myself and my family. It's going to be hard but hopefully it will be worth it.
Until something really exciting happens or I think of something really good to write about, I will be posting little things here and there to let you know I am still alive and kicking.

Here's another email joke I received this morning from my Uncle Doug.

Sick Leave

I urgently needed a few days off work but I knew the boss would not allow me to take leave.
I thought that maybe if I acted crazy, then he would tell me to take a few days off.
So, I hung upside-down on the ceiling & made funny noises.
My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing.
I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the boss might think I was crazy & give me a few days off.
A few minutes later the boss came into the office and asked, "What in the hell are you doing?"
I told him I was a light bulb.
He said, "You are clearly stressed out. Go home & recuperate for a couple of days."
I jumped down & walked out of the office.
When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the boss asked her "...And where do you think you're going?!"

She said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark!"

Monster Drawings

What would happen if you give some artists a kid’s drawing to copy and make their own? Here are some kid creatures redrawn by professional illustrators and artists.















I love it!

Drawer Geeks Kids Creatures

HDR Photography

Trey Ratcliff of Stuck in Customs is a fantastic HDR photographer. All of his shots are amazing, but I particularly like these two.



























Check out his blog and be prepared to spend quite some time there:
Trey Ratcliff - Stuck in Customs

FYI: HDR photography is the process of taking different exposures of an image and combining them (layering) into one image. The effect is awesome.

16 Months Old Today!

I think the name on the box says it all. It's been a long 16 months. But she's sooooo cute, it makes it all worth it.



Still not walking though......that has me worried.

Jen Stark Paper Artwork

I am in complete awe with Jen Stark’s amazing artwork, made out of regular multi-colored construction paper.

If you only click on just one link today, this should be it: Jen Stark

Name 50 States in 10 Minutes

50 States in 10 Minutes

Can you name all 50 states without consulting a map?

I forgot 6. It's much harder than you think.
You have ten minutes from page load to type in all 50 states. Yes, spelling counts.

VIA Neatorama

Springfield Forum

I don't even remember how or when I came upon this link but if you are from the Springfield and surrounding areas, you might enjoy this forum.

http://www.topix.net/forum/city/springfield-mo